His eye is on the sparrow…

Very early in my pregnancy I decided what colours I want to use for the baby’s nursery.  The theme took some time and developing, mainly because I wanted to use a theme suited for a girl or a boy, whichever we ended up having.  The colours are yellow, white and grey.  And depending on a boy or a girl we would incorporate highlight of either of the colour in the nursery.

Since we have been given a 90% chance of a girl, I feel developing a theme around a girl, should be fine.  And if it isn’t we will figure it out in a couple of weeks!

Ever since doing art at school, art needed to have a meaning to it.  It really has been a curse in some senses, because it means it takes me so much longer to develop at concept.  And if the symbolic meaning to whatever I am doing isn’t clearly thought out, I simply have no passion for the project and it becomes a complete flop.  Very often however, once I have  fitting concept, I can very easy build and grow onto this concept and it is then that the master piece truly begins!

Let’s take the nursery as an example:  The birdcage, although the bird in it’s essence represent a whole lot of things.  The birdcage translates from a wedding planned, a love share between two people and a passion for this growing person inside of me.

After the initial idea came to mind, I shared this with best friend.  Naturally she suggests that this theme could be translated to a boy as well as a girl.  And as true as it is, it is different.  A boy bird room is different from a girl bird room.  But it is possible and if need be, we will give the boy a bird-second-name like Robin or Finch!

On to new things, I found myself browsing the interweb in search of idea..  (truly making my husband crazy with all the things he either need to look at or comment on.  Poor man!)  This was when the above wording caught my attention.  I love the words and what it represents.  I love the fact that protecting this little one, isn’t up to me entirely and that I can never do enough to protect her.  I love that I have a Heavenly Father that has her best interest at heart, always:

His Eye Is on the Sparrow

Civilla D. Martin, 1905

  1. Why should I feel discouraged, why should the shadows come,
  2. Why should my heart be lonely, and long for heav’n and home,
    When Jesus is my portion? My constant Friend is He:
    His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me;
    His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me.

    • Refrain:
      I sing because I’m happy, I sing because I’m free,
      For His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me.
  3. “Let not your heart be troubled,” His tender word I hear,
    And resting on His goodness, I lose my doubts and fears;
    Though by the path He leadeth, but one step I may see;
    His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me;
    His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me.
  4. Whenever I am tempted, whenever clouds arise,
    When songs give place to sighing, when hope within me dies,
    I draw the closer to Him, from care He sets me free;
    His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me;
    His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me.
The words of the above song is based on the Scripture: Matthew 10:29-31.  These words are very comforting, now and thinking of all three my children’s future!
Wall vinyl Credit , Birdcage credit, song credit

things are happening:

Things are happening slightly faster than anticipated.  I wouldn’t call it a bad thing, maybe just a quick change of season:

I have been offered a position in Midrand.  The implication is that we will need to take Logan out of his current school and place him in a school closer to Kobus’ work.  Our intention was to put him in the primary school close to Kobus in 2012.

Things are happening a year early.

It was our intention to move to Pretoria East towards the end of next year, maybe even buy a property instead of renting.  Yet over the weekend our landlady advised that she wants to sell the property. 

Things are happening slightly quicker than planned.

I have been retrenched.  It has made me feel like a failure.  It has made me feel exceptionally uncertain of the future.  It has made me doubt my abilities.  The implication is that I am learning to trust in the unseen.  I am learning the meaning of faith and the act of it.

Things are happening.  Even when we don’t see it!

Kobus also sees the winds of change.  For him it is an exciting time filled with opportunity and local treasures waiting to be explored.  It is a time to reap the rewards!

Things are happening, excitement fills the air!

All in all, things are happening.  It may call for some discomfort.  It may call for a little bit of faith.  I am happy to announce a new season.  One I am excited about it, as it lays undefined in front of me.

Ups and Downs

It has been an uncomfortable couple of weeks.  All I want is for things to settle in a normal pattern of certainty and yet it seems we have made a decision to play for time and hope for a better kind certainty!

I can honestly say that I have an amazing man on my side, a man that will stand next to my side through thick and thin.  A man who stands behind my 100%.  A man who rubs my back and tells me everything is going to be alright!

Kobus and Lu

Althought some moments I find myself losing hope, most of the time I really believe him!

… with a bit of faith and a lot of hope!

I like change.  I believe changes is good and very needed!  I am an advocate for change! 

The last couple of days has been a bit up and down at work.  Well, let’s be honest the past couple of months have been a bit up and down for me career wise.  Expectations met, plans falling through, colleagues moving on.  You name it and it has happened.

My boss mentioned that there would be some changes around the office and that these changes would affect certain people.  He briefly mentioned what the changes would entail and yet when the paw-paw hit the fan yesterday, I felt freaked out.  For the first time the “changes” were visible!  For the first time I was worried scared shitless and wondering whether I would have a job in 3 months time. 

Now that the changes have begun I’m not so sure it’s the way I want them to happen.  I have no control over the things happening and so it feels like I have no control over the outcome either.  I just feel like I need to know what my immediate future entails.  I feel like I need to know whether I need to panic or not!  And then I wonder whether what my employer says is the whole truth, specially when I don’t feel secure, I don’t feel safe!

I want change.  For now however it is a waiting game where I do what I can, with a bit of faith and a lot of hope!

[ photo credit ]