The trick is in the paper-trail:

It has been pretty much a hectic day for me.  This morning the Maintenance Court (Court O) was graced with my presence.  Court O is a very scary place to be honest!  In the past I found myself in the basement of the court with million of other individuals crammed into a tiny space.  Your name is called and you (and the sperm-donor) along with a maintenance officer talk things through!


Court O is on the second floor, in a proper court – the type you read about in books.  The type you see in movies!  There is no list to confirm whether you are at the right place or not.  You wait (that much couldn’t possibly change – maintenance court and wait may as well be the same thing!!). 

So while waiting in the corridors you talk to moms with (hopefully) more experience than you do.  You hear their stories and you share your situation.  The stories that come out is honestly shocking!

The Sperm-Donor was there.  Well he was late, but better late than never I suppose!  He didn’t even say “good morning, how is my kid?”  Instead he sat in the spot I was sitting in (I was early) and left me to sit in the front row, which was quite exciting in the end (you get close up’s of all the dad’s sperm-donors).  After what felt like ages (I suppose I should count myself lucky, before morning-tea) my sperm-donor was called to the stand.

I wouldn’t call him highly intelligent or anything, but I think he followed the pattern of the other dads who said that a.) they would pay lawyers or b.) they would apply for legal aid.  Pity he didn’t follow some of the dads who paid the arrear maintenance before coming to court!  Oh well!  I’m sure he doesn’t realise how little he needs to earn in order to qualify for legal aid.  Then again maybe he is still unemployed in which case the judge should k@k him out for wasting time with legal aid when he could be looking for a job!

In short:  I’m going to the maintenance court again on the 7th of May!  And I am absolutely thrilled!

In the end I think the paper trail will speak for itself,  until then all you can do is vas-byt and to follow the procedure! 

Photo Credit


Hiding in the quiet corners…

 Me 2010

I feel so blessed to have a body to cuddle.  A mind to interact with.  Hands to hold and a calming aura to keep my still.  Kobus has been my rock these last couple of weeks.  Often I have found myself at the edge of my seat, stressed and worried.  Hoping for the best and waiting for things to play out. 

The waiting isn’t over. 

And yet I know, I have someone by my side that is here to stay no matter what and that makes the waiting bearable, that make the stressful moments less frightening.  Although these are completely new experiences to me, I am adapting quite quickly to the knowledge that someone really cares!

Although I havent been active with words, I have been inspired by some and filled with the magic of images.  Have a look over here if you don’t believe me :)


… with a bit of faith and a lot of hope!

I like change.  I believe changes is good and very needed!  I am an advocate for change! 

The last couple of days has been a bit up and down at work.  Well, let’s be honest the past couple of months have been a bit up and down for me career wise.  Expectations met, plans falling through, colleagues moving on.  You name it and it has happened.

My boss mentioned that there would be some changes around the office and that these changes would affect certain people.  He briefly mentioned what the changes would entail and yet when the paw-paw hit the fan yesterday, I felt freaked out.  For the first time the “changes” were visible!  For the first time I was worried scared shitless and wondering whether I would have a job in 3 months time. 

Now that the changes have begun I’m not so sure it’s the way I want them to happen.  I have no control over the things happening and so it feels like I have no control over the outcome either.  I just feel like I need to know what my immediate future entails.  I feel like I need to know whether I need to panic or not!  And then I wonder whether what my employer says is the whole truth, specially when I don’t feel secure, I don’t feel safe!

I want change.  For now however it is a waiting game where I do what I can, with a bit of faith and a lot of hope!

[ photo credit ]